So my friend, Amee, posed this question on Facebook the other day:
“so I was having a conversation earlier and I wondered what my FB friends/fam's opinion was...you know I'm obsessed w/ "Twlight" so after seeing "Eclipse" (for the 3rd time) today I started wondering...do you think love/passion like Bella/Edward's exists in the REAL world on only on paper/screen? This person I was talking to thinks it can't last for long b/c it will burn out...is that true? Curious...your thoughts?”
I’ve been thinking a lot about it and my answer. And well, my answer would be too long for a Facebook comment box! So without further ado, Amee, here is my answer: First, let me begin by saying that have not read the books or seen the movies. So, I cannot answer this question according to Bella and Edward. But, I’ve seen lots of movies and I feel like I have a pretty good idea what you are speaking of. I think the first question we have to ask is not can a love like that be sustained, but is that what love is?
I believe that love absolutely is passionate, consuming and full of desire just like we see in the movies. But is that all that love is? Is this a right view? I don’t think so. I think the problem is that those feelings are just a piece of love, but too many times they are all that we think of when we think of love. People break up relationships or divorce their spouse because they feel like the passion and flame are gone. And I think what has happened is they have cheated themselves of a true view of love. They’ve settled for less. They’ve settled for only a piece of love instead of the entire portion.
Love is passion. Love is desire. But if that is all there is, then it’s no different than lust. Love is so much more. Love rubs your back after a long day. Love holds your hair when you’re up sick all night. Love changes dirty diapers. Love puts up with mood swings. Love sleeps on an inclined bed so your pregnancy heartburn is not as bad. Love never makes you feel like less when you didn’t get everything done. Love helps you get in and out of the shower and on and off the toilet after a c-section. Love holds you when you cry over something that really isn’t worth your tears. Love holds you when you cry over things that do matter. Love cries with you. Love is there when you can’t face the diagnosis, or the loss, or the pain- love holds your hand. Love is the couple I saw at Chick-fil-a last week. The wife must have been in an accident of come kind- she was in a wheelchair, no longer able to feed herself. Her husband lovingly fed her and talked to her and stayed with her. Love doesn’t leave when things are hard. I know this is what love is. I know this because my husband shows me this love everyday. The passion and love we see in the movies pales in comparison to real love.
But I also know this is what love is because I know love. God is love. God did not create love. Nor does He just display love to us. God is love. It is the essence of who He is. To know God is to know love. And Jesus is the physical display of God’s love. Love washes His disciples feet. Love comforts mourning sisters. Love heals broken and sick bodies. Love reaches out to the lost, broken, sinful. Love carries a cross. Love bears our sin. Love bears our punishment. Love gives His life. Love passionately pursues His own. For God so loved the world…. This is love.
The problem is that we’ve believe a lie. A lie that love is just passion and desire. A lie that sell us so short of what God has for us. Can the passion and desire of love be sustained in the real world? Absolutely. But only if that passion and desire are just pieces of the entire love story. Only when we know Love. I know Him. He passionately pursued me and made me His own. Nothing would stop Him from His quest for me, not even death. And now He lavishes me everyday with His love- through His love letter, through my husband, through my children, through my friends. And He’ll never let me go- no matter how hard things get. I am His and He is mine- forever. Now that is a love story!